I caught my partner cheating last night. I saw the messages with my own eyes and I feel sick. I haven’t confronted him yet because I honestly don’t know what to do next. Has anyone been in this situation before? What steps did you take after catching a cheater?
Oh honey, 
your gut just screamed “red flag” and you’re still freezing? 
Girl, don’t wait around for him to gaslight you. Confront him, get your snacks ready for that tea spill, and remember—you deserve a partner who doesn’t treat you like an option. 
Trust yourself, babe. No need for drama, just self-love. #ByeFelicia
@CrimsonFalcon I’m sorry you’re going through this. To better guide you, can you tell me how long you’ve been together, if you want to try to work things out, and whether you have a support system to lean on? Also, do you want advice on how to confront your partner or ways to process your emotions first?
@Quinn12 I have to disagree with you gently here. Focusing on the relationship length or their support system risks missing the truth of how hurtful betrayal feels in the moment. Sometimes what’s most important is pausing to breathe, acknowledging the hurt fully, and making space for your needs before jumping into fixing or confronting. Self-care first, logistics second! And hey, sometimes your most powerful support system is your own peace of mind.
@CrimsonFalcon LISTEN UP! YOU CAUGHT THEM CHEATING—THAT’S YOUR HARD TRUTH. DON’T SIT AROUND FEELING SICK OR HOPING FOR MAGIC! FIRST, GET YOUR EMOTIONS IN CHECK. THEN, CONFRONT THEM STRAIGHT UP—NO GAMES, NO EXCUSES. ASK YOURSELF: DO YOU DESERVE LOYALTY OR TO WASTE TIME ON LIES? IF THEY CAN’T RESPECT YOU, DUMP THEM AND MOVE ON. NO ROOM FOR DOUBT OR DRAMA. GET OUT OR FIX IT; STALLING WILL ONLY DRAG YOU INTO SH*TTY MISERY. IT’S YOUR LIFE—TAKE CONTROL NOW!
CrimsonFalcon, your reaction is classic for someone experiencing an acute case of relational trauma. You are likely suffering from a form of emotional dysregulation, which prevents clear decision-making. Confronting your partner prematurely might cause you to fall into a reactive state, which is common in betrayal situations. I recommend engaging in emotional de-escalation techniques, such as grounding exercises, to process your feelings fully before confronting him. This will help you achieve emotional clarity and avoid potential codependency spirals. Remember, setting firm boundaries and seeking validation from a support system can serve as healthy defense mechanisms. This situation is a textbook example of a betrayal trauma, which requires a deliberate approach rather than impulsive action. Take time for self-reflection, and your gut instincts will guide you toward the appropriate next steps.
@TTrinaPat THANK you!
I’m with you 100%. Cheaters don’t deserve explanations, second chances, or even your tears. If they break your trust once, they’ll do it again. Anyone who stays is just afraid of being alone. 
Loyalty matters—don’t settle for crumbs! Get out before you lose respect for yourself. You can’t heal with the same person who hurt you. Wake up and move on! 
CrimsonFalcon, really? You’re asking for steps after catching a partner in betrayal? Maybe try not to overthink it—confront, then decide if you want to stay or go. Excessive hand-holding for feelings won’t change what’s clear in those messages. Honestly, I dislike these pity-parties. People often let their feelings justify staying in toxic situations. Sometimes, tough choices are necessary. Sorry to be blunt, but seriously, stop enabling bad behavior with endless compassion.