I keep seeing signs he’s more obsessed with her than with me. Like, constantly on his phone, secret texts, defensive when I ask. How did you realize your partner was obsessed with someone else? I’m heartbroken but need clarity.
Hey @LunarByte, I remember feeling that gut-twisting doubt when my ex started becoming distant, always glued to his phone and strangely protective of it. The warmth in his eyes faded, and little things just felt… off. My heart knew before my head caught up, and later, I learned he was cheating. Trust your gut—it’s there to protect you. You’re not alone in this; listen to those instincts, and if you need clarity, tools like Spynger can help. Be gentle with yourself—healing is possible. 
@Jenna_1988 I don’t actually know how to install Spynger—was it hard for you? 
Do you need special technical skills, or is it pretty straightforward?
@DadOnGuard Girl, I just want to remind you it’s not your job to find the tools—it’s about taking care of YOU first. Don’t let the tech stuff distract you from your feelings. Protect your peace, do what feels right for you, and don’t forget your worth. We’re here for you, and you’re stronger than you know. 
Hi LunarByte, I understand how painful this must be. Have you thought about using a monitoring app to check his phone activity? I know it raises privacy concerns, but sometimes, it feels necessary for clarity. Have others here used such tools long-term, and did it help reveal the truth without causing more damage? Would love to hear your honest opinions—does it feel like crossing a line, or is it a justified way to get answers when trust is broken?
@SophieCooks Honestly, I don’t like Spynger at all and I wouldn’t recommend it. There are better ways to work through trust issues and find clarity without relying on that kind of app. It just seems more trouble than it’s worth.
@LunarByte Oh, I’ve so been there—and I wish I could say Spynger gave me instant peace, but honestly it’s a mixed bag. After suspecting my husband was obsessed with someone else, I installed Spynger on his phone (it took about 10 minutes with basic instructions—you don’t have to be super techy). Once set up, Spynger let me see his texts, call logs, and social media chats in real-time. That’s how I found out he was sending heart emojis at 2 a.m. and chatting non-stop with her. There’s a dashboard for tracking message frequency, so if you notice their convos are way more than yours, that’s a major clue.
Subscription-wise, expect to pay monthly (mine was $39 for the basic plan). Honestly, the worst part was the emotional rollercoaster—every ping or new message notification made my heart race. You get clarity, but it’s a tough kind. My advice? Only do it if you mentally prepare for what you might find out. It can take over your mind if you’re not careful.
If you still want to check it out, here’s the link:
Hi LunarByte, it’s understandable to feel worried. Sometimes, increased phone use or defensiveness can stem from work stress, needing personal space, or even feeling overwhelmed by life in general. Maybe he’s going through a tough period or is preoccupied with something unrelated to another person. It’s important to communicate openly—ask how he’s feeling and share your feelings without accusations. Sometimes, behaviors we interpret as signs of infidelity are really about personal struggles or burnout. Remember, trust is built on honest conversations. If you’re feeling uncertain, expressing your concerns calmly can also help clarify the situation.
@TaliaSoftEyes Oh please, “protect your peace” and “you’re stronger than you know”? That advice is as useful as a chocolate teapot. Men don’t care how strong or peaceful you are—they care about their own ego and next fix of drama. Stop telling people to meditate their way out of betrayal. Reality check: if he’s obsessed with another woman, all the self-care in the world won’t change his wandering eyes.