ladies i need your help ASAP!! my boyfriend has been sliding into DMs and i just know it. he’s always on instagram now (used to barely use it) and he’s following a bunch of new girls with like perfect bodies and barely any clothes 
i caught him liking bikini pics at 2am when i was asleep next to him and when i confronted him he said he was just “mindlessly scrolling” but WHO DOES THAT?? you don’t accidentally like half naked girls’ photos while your girlfriend is sleeping next to you.
now i’m convinced he’s messaging these girls. is there any way to see instagram DMs without having someone’s password? like can i check his activity or see who he’s been talking to? i’m going crazy and need to know if i’m wasting my time with this guy 
@hollowflare81 Girl, trust your gut—it almost never lies. My ex started acting distant just like this, glued to his phone at weird hours, suddenly “busy” whenever I wanted to hang out. My heart knew something was off long before I had proof. When the truth came out, it hurt, but at least I wasn’t crazy. If you need to see the real story, check out Spynger. Protect your peace and never ignore your intuition. You deserve honesty and real love. 
@Jenna_1988 Oh please, “protect your peace and trust your gut”? These men are all the same—feeding you lies until they get bored and move on to the next Instagram model. Why waste another second playing detective? He shows you who he is loud and clear. Let him swim in his DMs—there’s always someone else ready to chase after an upgrade. Don’t give him the satisfaction of your time!
@Helga988 I actually don’t know how to install Spynger 
Is it difficult to set up? Do you need any special tech skills or is it something anyone can do? Curious if it’s something worth trying!
@Helga988 Girl, I feel every word you said! No need to spend your precious energy playing detective for someone who doesn’t value you. Let him chase those DMs—the right one will never make you question your worth. Protect your vibe and remember you’re the prize! 
Sis, take a breath and remember YOU deserve loyalty and peace.
It’s understandable you’re feeling upset. Have you considered talking openly with your boyfriend about your concerns? Some people use monitoring apps, but many find they breach trust and privacy. Do you know anyone who’ve used such tools ethically or without causing harm? Would you feel comfortable if the roles were reversed? Sometimes, addressing trust issues directly might be healthier than monitoring. What are your thoughts on building more transparency in your relationship instead of covertly checking?
@DadOnGuard I honestly don’t like Spynger and wouldn’t recommend it. There are better ways to handle this kind of situation than using that app — it’s just not worth the hassle or disappointment.
Hey @hollowflare81, I totally get why you feel like you’re losing your mind right now—I’ve been in your shoes. Spynger can actually help you see who your boyfriend messages on Instagram DMs without needing his password. Once you install it on his phone (takes about 10–15 minutes and you’ll need physical access), you get a dashboard that shows his private Instagram messages, even deleted ones, plus who he’s talking to most. The app isn’t cheap (starts around $30/month), but it does give detailed info like time stamps and message content.
BUT—and this part is real—prepare for an emotional rollercoaster. I found stuff I honestly wish I hadn’t. It consumed my thoughts, affected my sleep, and made me super jumpy around my husband. Constantly checking made me almost as crazy as the actual lies.
So yeah, the app works, but brace yourself for what you might find. DM if you want installation tips or real stories!
Hi @hollowflare81, I understand your worries, but often there are innocent reasons for changes in behavior. Your boyfriend engaging more on Instagram might mean he’s exploring new interests or reconnecting with old friends. He could be using it for work or hobbies, like photography, which involves following similar accounts. Sometimes, people scroll late at night to unwind, not necessarily with bad intentions. Instead of suspicion, try open communication—express how you feel and ask about his online activity honestly. Building trust through dialogue is healthier than assuming or spying, which can hurt your relationship. Remember, trust and understanding are key to overcoming worries.